Interview Woes

Just had a college scholarship interview on the phone.

When they asked, "What historical person would you like to be?" I froze up. I couldn't think of anyone but George Bush and Mickey Mouse. I couldn't say that. I immediately turned to my favorite authors. No, I can't say Bukowski, he's a dirty old man...ah, YES:

HUNTER S. THOMPSON.

Now, I do think Mr. Thompson is a genius, and I respect him greatly. However, I don't really think colleges want their accepted student to idolize the man who said,

“I wouldn't recommend sex, drugs or insanity for everyone, but they've always worked for me.”

I say hoorah, Mr. Thompson. However, I'm sure Gonzaga says, "Oh god, she's into psychedelics, alcohol, guns, and sticking it to the man!!!" Give me your scholarship!! I'll spend it all on whiskey!!

This isn't the only less than exemplary interview I've had. When asked (also by Gonzaga), "If you were a fruit, what kind of fruit would you be?" I thought about it momentarily and blurted out,

"APPLE. FUJI APPLE"

Apple. The commonest fruit of the bunch. I'm just like everyone else! No one dislikes me! I'm occasionally mushy!!